Sunday, November 20, 2005

You've got WHAT for sale?

Miss the Soviet Union?

Pining over the destruction of the Berlin Wall?

Want to split Germany back up?

And your life just hasn't been the same since the threat of MAD (Mutually Assured Destruction) has slipped away...

You still practice "Duck and Cover" drills with your kids, stockpiled a years' worth of food and ammunition in your makeshift fallout shelter in your cellar?
Well have no fear! You yourself can own your very own little piece of the Cold War!
Want a Titan II missile silo and connecting control bunker? (Able to withstand a direct hit of a 20 megaton warhead from a Soviet SS 22, GUARANTEED or your money joyfully refunded!)
The US Government spent Trillions of dollars building this stuff all over the country, now you can own a piece of it for PENNIES ON THE DOLLAR!
But act now, they're going fast at these prices! They sure don't build em' like this anymore!
Actually, this is kind of neat. There was a Nike~Ajax missile base in Bensalem, PA about five miles from where I grew up. It had long-since been deactivated years before I was born, but when I was 10 or so it was still there... Albeit overgrown and completely overtaken by woods. It was a great place for a bunch of ten-year-olds to play 'war' in... Lots of tunnels and bunkers... I remember it well. That place is long gone now but there's still thousands of places like this all over the country that you can buy.
The odd thing is I really enjoy exploring places like these. Not just military sites, but long abandoned buildings and factories... Some far out of the way deep in the woods. I remember quite a few years ago I was deer hunting in Potter County, PA and I stumbled upon an abandoned farm so far into the woods it had to have been five or six miles from the nearest road. It looked like it hadn't been occupied for a hundred years. Needless to say deer hunting was rapidly forgotten and I explored this old house, barn and other outbuildings. The house was so old it wasn't wired for electricity, and there was even some rusted antique tools still in a shed...
I find that stuff fascinating. Like taking a trip back in time in my mind... I could almost feel the ghosts of the former owners watching me as I explored room to room, trying hard not to disturb anything and leave the place exactly as I found it... Who were these people? Where did they come from? Why did they leave?
But, if that's not your thing and you have a cool 1.2 million to blow on a hardened bunker in South Dakota, here's your chance!
Copyright 2005 Thomas J Wolfenden

6 comments:

Lora said...

Too funny sales pitch, Tom! :) I'd no idea there were such desireable properties available.

The mom in me wants to scold you for playing in such a potentially dangerous place as the abandoned missile plant, but I'll refrain.

And I also love investigating old abandoned places; something I began doing as a kid with my mom and dad. They were into it, too. I like to imagine the people who lived there and what things looked like back then. We would locate the old dump site on farms and homesteads and dig for buried treasure: old bottles, broken dishes, etc.

This topic has given me inspiration for a blog of my own concerning my great, great, great (he was a really great guy) grandfather's homestead. Coming soon to a blogspot near you!

berly02 said...

I never knew I wanted to own a part of a missile, until now. :)

Also, your exploring sounds like horror movie screenplay.
"Man goes into woods to deer hunt, sees an old abandoned home. He enters, never to return . . . "

Lindsey said...

My brothers did all that investigating and war playing too. Me...I was too big of a chicken. Especially after they came across some guy growing pot in his back yard and he ran them off...

Ranger Tom said...

Lora: I know 'Mom'... It WAS dangerous... But back that long ago the world was a much different place. Folks could let the kids roam all over the place by themselves for hours, miles away from home and not worry. And I look forward to the homestead story. I really liked your hunting story, left a comment.

Berly: That gives me a good idea for a story...

Linny: Yeah, that could be dangerous... Stumbling onto somebody's dope patch. Luckily that never happpened to us.

Airforce Guy said...

i went 2 a silo base out side of tucson on a school trip it was kewl they gave us a tour a the hole place ther was even a rocket in the silo

Lisa said...

When did you go changing your title? I like it...